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Encouraging Quotes
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Funny Quotes

May you find comfort and joy in these encouraging Funny quotes and sayings.

Life's burdens are lighter when I laugh at myself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Related topics: Inspirational Life Human-Nature Psychology Live-By Cute Whimsey Wisdom Humor

Life is too important to be taken seriously.
- Oscar Wilde PHOTO

A true friend is someone who
thinks that you are a good egg
even though he knows that
you are slightly cracked.
- Bernard Meltzer

You have enemies? Good.
That means you've stood up for something,
sometime in your life.
- Winston Churchill

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Thank You,
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Today is your day to laugh at life,
laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad,
laugh loud - laugh often,
laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Minds are like parachutes.
They only function when they are open.
- James Dewar

Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz

 

Why not go out on a limb?
Isn't that where the fruit is?
- Mark Twain

When a thing is funny, search it for a hidden truth.
- George Bernard Shaw

The first sigh of love is the last breath of wisdom.
- Anonymous

Laugh Loud - Laugh Often
Laugh At What's Funny - Laugh At What's Sad
Laugh At Me - Laugh At You - Laugh At Life
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

When you think you're out of time,
smile, and turn back the clock.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
- Phyllis Diller

When you reach the end of your rope,
tie a knot and hang on.
- Anonymous Saying
(Sometimes attributed to Franklin D. Roosevelt,
Eleanor Roosevelt, or Thomas Jefferson)

The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all
is the person who argues with him.
- Stanislaw Jerszy Lec

My life has been filled with terrible misfortune;
most of which never happened.
- Michel Eyquem De Montaigne

Times like these, dark times,
they do funny things to people.
They can tear them apart.
- the movie Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (2009)

We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks-
if we agree with him.
- Mark Twain

As to marriage or celibacy, let a man
take which course he will,
he will be sure to repent.
- Socrates

You got to be careful if you
don't know where you're going,
because you might not get there.
- Yogi Berra

When we remember we are all mad,
the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
- Mark Twain

A person with a new idea is
a crank until the idea succeeds.
- Mark Twain

Life would be tragic if it weren't funny.
- Stephen Hawking

Always listen to the experts.
They'll tell you what can't be done and why.
Then do it.
- Robert Heinlein

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.
- Milton Berle

No problem is so formidable that
you can't walk away from it.
- Charles M. Schulz' cartoon Peanuts

Okay, here's your first lesson: how to take a FALL!
- the movie Karate Kid

Nine-tenths of the people were created
so you would want to be with the other tenth.
- Horace Walpole

Here are the opinions on which my facts are based.
- Anonymous

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth
or burn down your house, you can never tell.
- Joan Crawford

The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.
It is never of any use to oneself.
- Oscar Wilde

I am no longer young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde

Sometimes I've believed as many as
six impossible things before breakfast.
- Lewis Carroll

I choose my friends for their good looks,
my acquaintances for their good characters,
and my enemies for their intellects.
A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
- Oscar Wilde

All you need is love.
But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt.
- Charles M. Schulz

Donkey, you HAVE the right to remain silent.
What you lack, is the capacity.
- said by Shrek in the movie Shrek 2

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times,
always with the same person.
- Germaine Greer

I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
- Charles M. Schulz

Life ... full of loneliness, and misery,
and suffering, and unhappiness,
and it's all over much too quickly.
- the Woody Allen movie Annie Hall

It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.
- W. C. Fields

Big sisters are the crabgrass in the lawn of life.
- Linus Van Pelt in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts cartoon

I'm just preparing my impromptu remarks.
- Winston Churchill

Nothing is so common-place as to wish to be remarkable.
- Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

There's a fine line between genius and insanity.
I have erased this line.
- Oscar Levant

I never make stupid mistakes.
Only very, very clever ones.
- John Peel

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
- Groucho Marx

I've developed a new philosophy...
I only dread one day at a time.
- the character Charlie Brown in Charles M. Schulz' Peanuts comic

I truly believe that happiness is possible...
even when you're thirty-three
and have a bottom the size of two bowling balls.
- the movie Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason

The road to success is always under construction.
- Anonymous

Whenever I feel the need to exercise,
I lie down until it goes away.
- Robert Maynard Hutchins

Today is my day to laugh at life.
Laugh loud - laugh often.
Laugh at what's funny - laugh at what's sad.
Laugh at me - laugh at you - laugh at life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

The trouble with having an open mind, of course,
is that people will insist on coming along
and trying to put things in it.
- Terry Pratchett

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
- Mark Twain

The secret of ugliness consists not in irregularity,
but in being uninteresting.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

If you are not one of us, you are one of them.
- the movie The Matrix (1999)

Love is an endless mystery,
for it has nothing else to explain it.
- Rabindranath Tagore

One day Alice came to a fork in the road
and saw a Cheshire cat in a tree.
"Which road do I take?" she asked.
His responses was a question: "Where do you want to go?"
"I don't know," Alice answered.
"Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."
- Lewis Carroll

Love conquers all things except poverty and a toothache.
- Mae West

I love being married.
It's so great to find that one special person
you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
- Rita Rudner

True love comes quietly,
without banners or flashing lights.
If you hear bells, get your ears checked.
- Erich Segal

Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits
and then complain that he's not the man she married?
- Barbra Streisand

To fall in love is awfully simple,
but to fall out of love is simply awful.
- Bess Myerson

When you're drowning, you don't say,
"I would be incredibly pleased if someone
would have the foresight to notice
me drowning and come and help me,"
you just scream.
- John Lennon

I'm a very loyal and unreliable friend.
- Bono

I do not fear death.
I had been dead for billions and billions
of years before I was born,
and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.
- Mark Twain

You can always do one thing less than you think you can.
- Anonymous

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.
- Mark Twain

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore,
and that's what parents were created for.
- Ogden Nash

A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
- W. C. Fields

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
- Steve Martin

What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?
- the movie Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (2002)


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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie

Encouraging Quotes




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