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I don't like to think of laws
as rules you have to follow,
but more as suggestions.
- George Carlin
Related topics: Cynical Cute Whimsey
I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out
where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
- George Carlin
As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero,
he no longer is.
- George Carlin
If a man smiles all the time,
he's probably selling something that doesn't work.
- George Carlin
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- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
I would never want to be a member of a group
whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
- George Carlin
So far, this is the oldest I've been.
- George Carlin
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
- George Carlin
One great thing about getting old is that
you can get out of all sorts of social obligations
just by saying you're too tired.
- George Carlin
Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
- George Carlin
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
- George Carlin
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
- George Carlin
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them;
I loathe and despise the groups
they identify with and belong to.
- George Carlin
Honesty may be the best policy,
but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination,
dishonesty is the second-best policy.
- George Carlin
The reason I talk to myself is because
I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
- George Carlin
The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American
recently passed each other in opposite directions.
- George Carlin
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe,
then I'd have to say that the universe
aimed rather low and settled for very little.
- George Carlin
No one knows what's next, but everybody does it.
- George Carlin
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
- George Carlin
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
- George Carlin
Think of how stupid the average person is,
and realize half of them are stupider than that.
- George Carlin
Inside every cynical person,
there is a disappointed idealist.
- George Carlin
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
- George Carlin
If it requires a uniform, it's a worthless endeavor.
- George Carlin
One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends
is that three out of four murders
are committed by people who know the victim.
- George Carlin
Capitalism tries for a delicate balance:
It attempts to work things out so that
everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from
getting violent and trying to take other people's stuff.
- George Carlin
Religion has convinced people that there's an invisible man
... living in the sky. Who watches everything you do
every minute of every day. And the invisible man
has a list of ten specific things he doesn't want you to do.
And if you do any of these things,
he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire
and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever,
and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream,
until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you.
He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin
Anger is like a thorn in the heart.
- Yiddish Proverb
Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal
with the intent of throwing it at someone else;
you are the one who gets burned.
- The Buddha
Time, like life itself, has no inherent meaning.
We give our own meaning to time as to life.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
We have only this moment,
sparkling like a star in our hand -
and melting like a snowflake.
- Marie B. Ray
Sing like no one's listening,
love like you've never been hurt,
dance like nobody's watching,
and live like its heaven on earth.
- Mark Twain
Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates.
You never know what you're gonna get.
- the movie Forrest Gump
Obstacles are like wild animals.
They are cowards but they will bluff you if they can.
If they see you are afraid of them...
they are liable to spring upon you;
but if you look them squarely in the eye,
they will slink out of sight.
- Orison Swett Marden
What if we just acted like everything was easy?
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Let your life lightly dance on the edges of Time
like dew on the tip of a leaf.
- Rabindranath Tagore
Love comforteth like sunshine after rain.
- William Shakespeare
We are shaped by our thoughts;
we become what we think.
When the mind is pure, joy follows
like a shadow that never leaves.
- The Buddha
We are most like God when we forgive.
- Anonymous
Time expands like a brightly colored balloon
when it is filled with joy.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Celebrate! Celebration is an expression of Gratitude.
Gratitude is like the prayer, while
Celebration is the hymn and sacred dance.
Celebration is its own road to happiness.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is like a ten speed bicycle.
Most of us have gears we never use.
- Charles M. Schulz
Just stop it. Seriously.
Whatever it is. Just stop it.
If only for an hour, a day, a week.
Stop doing it long enough to get a glimpse
of what the change would actually look like.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Dance like no one is watching,
love like you'll never be hurt.
Sing like no one is listening.
Live life like it's heaven on earth.
- Anonymous (various attributions and alternate phrasings)
Fear is the cheapest room in the house.
I would like to see you living
In better conditions.
- Hafiz
Worrying is like a rocking chair,
it gives you something to do,
but it gets you nowhere.
- Glenn Turner
We are formed and molded by our thoughts.
Those whose minds are shaped by selfless thoughts
give joy when they speak or act.
Joy follows them like a shadow that never leaves them.
- The Buddha
Kindness, like a boomerang, always returns.
- Anonymous
Forgive and give as if it were your last opportunity.
Love like there's no tomorrow, and if tomorrow comes, love again.
- Max Lucado
Minds are like parachutes.
They only function when they are open.
- James Dewar
If I try to be like him, who will be like me?
- Yiddish proverb
Man's enemies are not demons, but human beings like himself.
- Lao Tzu
Why, I'd like nothing better than to achieve
some bold adventure, worthy of our trip.
- Aristophanes
If you don't like something, change it,
If you can't change it, change your attitude
- Maya Angelou
The unknown is like the darkness of a cave -
it can be illuminated by the brief light
of one adventurer's small candle.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
The greatest lovers are like twin blooms,
each reflecting the passion and the glory of the other.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
This time, like all times, is a very good one,
if we but know what to do with it.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Find your balance and stand with it.
Find your song and sing it out.
Find your cadence and let it appear like a dance.
Find the questions that only you know how to ask and
The answers that you are content to not know.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
A person without a sense of humor
is like a wagon without springs.
It's jolted by every pebble on the road.
- Henry Ward Beecher
Work like you don't need the money.
Love like you've never been hurt.
Dance like nobody's watching.
- Satchel Paige
Expressing gratitude seems like a cosmic invitation
for all kinds of thankfulness and appreciation to pour in.
- Mary Anne Radmacher
Like a bird in flight, your life can soar
above the troubles of the world.
Breathe deep, choose, and break the shackles of your past.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Like an Eagle, May You Always Soar
High Above the Troubles of the World.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
When you see something done,
know that you intended it.
If you don't like what you see,
then deeply examine your intentions.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Like a Dolphin, I am Graceful, Powerful, and Compassionate.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Women are like teabags.
We don't know our true strength
until we are in hot water!
- Eleanor Roosevelt
If I could tell the world just one thing
it would be we're all okay,
and not to worry cause worry is wasteful
and useless in times like these.
I won't be made useless.
I won't be idle with despair,
I will gather myself around my faith.
Light does the darkness most fear.
- Jewel
If a man speaks or acts with a pure thought,
happiness follows him, like a shadow that never leaves him.
- The Buddha
Like a Chameleon, I Adapt to Changing Circumstances.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
Life is like a game of cards.
The hand you are dealt is determinism;
the way you play it is free will.
- Jawaharlal Nehru
Leaders aren't born they are made.
And they are made just like anything else, through hard work.
And that's the price we'll have to pay
to achieve that goal, or any goal.
- Vince Lombardi
"Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?"
Jesus replied:
"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart
and with all your soul and with all your mind.'
This is the first and greatest commandment.
And the second is like it:
'Love your neighbor as yourself.'
All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments."
- Matthew 22:36-40
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May the world be kind to you,
and may your own thoughts be gentle upon yourself.
- Jonathan Lockwood Huie
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